How Do You Deal?

by Bailey Oas ’11

baileyOasThis post coming to you live from my home away from home, Tuscaloosa, Alabama. New semester. Fresh start.

With the recent events that have been going on in my life you would honestly think we’ve been on a reality show or we could easily have a Lifetime Movie special. One of those prime time one’s that airs at 8 P.M. On top of all of that I landed in Birmingham Tuesday night after being delayed for two hours and they lost a piece of my luggage… and then Wednesday morning while trying to go to class my car wouldn’t start! The hits keep coming, holy buckets!! Insanity. Anyway, as I have been working through the chaos and trying to wrap my mind around all sorts of things a dear friend of mine said while venting in the car on the way home from the airport, “you know what, you’re blog will really help you deal with all of this.” So here I am friends.

We all like to think that we are always the most prime versions of ourselves. Constantly on our A game. Always ready to take on anyone or anything that gets in our way. But what happens when the fortress we have built starts to be invaded? The walls we have stacked so high to our head and our heart start to fall and our emotions take over and the outsiders start to weigh in.

So here’s my question: how do YOU deal? Do you retreat into your hole and try to protect yourself? Or do you fight back. Do you fight for the life you have worked so hard for and for the person you have become so that no one can break you? I think, with each of us, it varies.

I got some great advice from another friend when I asked him how I was supposed to find the lesson in it all. I asked him to help me figure out the lesson because there has to be one. I know things happen for a reason so how do I find the answer? His response was perfect and accurate. He said there isn’t always a lesson out of everything. Sometimes the lesson is that you just need to chalk it up to a loss and move on. Or focus more on the higher power. And he’s totally right.

So here’s my answer: life can really stink, and sometimes it can feel like you’re just treading water. But in the same breath life can be amazing and beautiful. EVERYTHING happens for a reason. I am a firm believer in that fact, and that God has a hand in every piece of our lives. God wouldn’t give it to use if he didn’t think we could handle it. If you can learn to look for the lesson in things that matter, it can only help you learn from experiences and thrive. You have to decide YOUR destiny and what you will allow to effect your world. Strength comes from experience and your ability to persevere and in my opinion, faith. I know by putting my trust in God and just learning to let go, things will regain their clarity. Not to mention writing this blog… lol. Life may get me down, but I fight for what I have and where I am in my life because I know exactly what I want. I want to be strong like my parents, fearless like my friends and independent so that I know no matter what happens, I can always take care of myself.

So here’s to learning how to deal when you reach the end of your rope, and finding the ability and strength to persevere through the dark.



3 thoughts on “How Do You Deal?”

  1. “I want to be strong like my parents, fearless like my friends. . .” As a grandparent of Holy Trinity students, I can assure you that parents do not always feel strong and friends are not always fearless. One of the things that resilient people do is share their problems with others. It’s OK to vent in your blog and with your friends as long as you don’t dwell on the bad things. Move on, as your friend said.

    Some of the lessons we learn in life allow us to better understand our own personal values. What is really important to me? What things and relationships do I need to cherish and protect and what things do I need to let go. Listen to your inner compass.

    You are using humor to help you cope, such as seeing yourself on a Reality Show or a Lifetime Movie. That’s a great way to help yourself through difficult situations.

    Music, comfort food, prayer, and a good night’s sleep can also go a long way toward helping you see the positives in life. I think you are off to a great start. I wish you well.

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